About the Classic Look for Men....

Mr. Milfs' Timeless Look (part 1 of 2)

Today I will tackle the classic look that never goes out of style. There are some clothing items that withstand the test of time and fashion. Regardless if you are taking your lovely lady for a night out in the city, heading out in the jeep to explore the mountains, or just head out to grab some coffee on a sunday morning…This look is time tested and transcends past, present, and future decades - It saddens me to see guys fall victim to the ever so changing fashion trends. It's ridiculous, and the truth of the matter is that - all tho' it might seem like a good idea at the time, to impress the women, it is and always will be a total "Fail" situation. These are my top items that comprise my classic look…ultimately you will have to find your own.

Lets start at the feet and climb our way to the top….

Socks - To me this is a no brainer. There is something magical about putting on a brand new pair of wool socks. Its like laying your head on a Goose Down pillow after a week long backpacking trip tossing and turning on a stuff sack of bulky clothing…Or like the first time you got high off pain killers. Here are some of my favorites.
SmartWool Merino Heavy Mountaineering socks - $19.99 ea.

Thorlo Medium Hiker - $12.99

Thorlo Running Crew - $7.99

Shoes - I initially thought this was going to be a tough one, but then i decided to just inventory my closet and pick out the shoes that I have been wearing since I have been a little kiddo. As I got to my closet I realized that I don't have near the inventory of shoes that I used to. I counted ONLY 8 pairs of shoes/ boots. Wow! Thats it?!? Out of this selection of 8 there are only 2 pair that I have worn since adolescence, and one pair that I have been meaning to replace for the last 5 years.

Adidas Samba $59.00 - Classic White with black stripes and suede rand & Classic Black with white stripes and suede rand


LaSprotiva Makalu - Classic Mountaineering Boot $259.00

Classic Timberland Chukka $159.00 - This boot is currently not in my closet, and is not a shoe/boot that I have worn from early age on, but I remember getting my first pair sometime in the late 80's. It has to be my all time favorite due to its classic look, great construction, and cloud like heal to toe instep. (definitely on my 2010 X-mas List)


Moving on……Grrrrr……Pants! All I can say is that I prefer the classic loose leg fit of any type of pant. I wear my pants on my hips, but like them form fit around my ass. I like them loose but not baggy in the legs. To each his own - but there is something wrong with guys wearing extremely tight Or baggy pants. This is obviously subject to your build!!! It goes with out saying that your pants should never get close to your belly button Or drop below your hip bones….A word of advise to all you wanna be gangsta's - wearing your pants on or below your Ass is just as bad as having them pulled up above your belly button. Douche!
Length?…This is easy! 1/4 of an inch off the ground from the heal of your shoes! ;)

Belts…probably the most under rated accessory of your look, but the color and buckle should not clash with your shoes/ boots. It should be a well worn in piece of leather that compliments your pedal attire and other accessories. Don't wear a black belt with a shiny gold buckle if you are wearing a pair of rugged suede Makalus and and a white gold/ platinum wedding band!!! 'Nuf said on this one- eh?!


Ok, this is a 2 segment piece and next week I will tackle the meat and bones of the Classic look and put together the final LOOK! Until then I wish my fellow Male Milfians' good fortune and blissful bottoms up on your testosterone filled HumpDay adventures. GutHolz Pussies!

p.s. If you totally found this segment of the blog lame and boring, I will treat you with something Classic and Timeless that will reward you for chewing through this piece! You could relate it to watching the worst C Movie only to see some T&A….here you go…..something that withstands the test of time and will always be in fashion. Photo curtesy of one of the best (if not the best) Kansas City Photographers - Paul Andrews

Technical Tuesday: Washing Machine

Technical Tuesday….

When talking about love/hate relationships, this appliance places in my all time top three. Lets talk washing machines!

…Over the last 10 years a lot has changed in the washing Machine Industry. The once ever so popular top loading, laundry swallowing, and water consuming BEAST has been replaced by a sleek front loading, moderate loadable, efficient water using Pussycat. I bought my first washer for $75.00. It was a used Whirlpool High Capacity washer with limited features…I think the options were water temperature/ cycle and capacity of the load. Thats it folks! What more did you need? Once a week I would feed that monster a 5 course meal, stuffing its drum to the point the lid would not close, and I never had any problems with it. I loved it - it took care of me and I took care of it. In the 5 years I owned it, I had to replace a piece for the agitator once, and other than that the only issue was the occasional un-balanced load - which to its defense, was my wife's fault for not filling it with enough laundry!

One sad saturday morning, after having withstood several cross country moves and the customary loving abuse, its fate was sealed when it would not turn on. It was probably a cheap fix, but Trisha had already been eyeballing washers at Lowe's and HomoDe-Pot for the past 6 months. This was a no win situation, so I did not even step up to bat!

…Enter into our family the new sleek, upright, front loading, space machine looking, spin cycle sounding like a jet engine, too many features, no water using, dry cleaning, ironing, and the MOST FOUL SMELLING WASHER in the universe. WTF?!? Yes my friends you heard it here and if you have a front loader, then you already knew it!

If not used and maintained correctly they will make your laundry smell sour and stink up your laundry room. The good news is that after you finally figure out what the hell is going on, you can fix it. First lets understand what happens. Since the entire drum is never filled with water, and the clothes slosh around in about 3 cups of water in the bottom of the drum, dirt and grime accumulate at the top of the washer (in-between the drum and the outer tub) when the laundry goes into spin cycle. If not maintained/ cleaned properly your washer will smell like Arse. Ok, so here are some fixes and helpful hints

1. Once a week run about two cycles with a couple heavy towels on sanitary with a bunch of bleach. This will break up the build up or possible mold forming. Wow, real efficient eh - having to run extra cycles using water and energy! Note: this problem takes about 6 months to develop. It's not something you are going to see as soon as you use it.

2. Leave the washer door open! This will reduce the chance of mold forming in-between the drum and outer tub

3. Transfer laundry immediately to dryer - due to the washing chamber being air tight, anything left in there longer than 24 hours will start smelling sour. The old washers were not sealed and had some minimal airflow which allowed for a longer sit time before rewashing was required.

4. Limit your use of Fabric softeners! All fabric softeners are made up of water and fats, and these will increase the accumulation of unwanted deposits in your washer.

So there it is. I told you it was a love hate relationship. I used to love my washing machine, and now I hate it! If you have any questions regarding fixing some of your washing machine problems just post questions in the comments sections. Until next week Milfians! I wish you technical harmony and the clean smell of the old top-loaders!

...the fiber construct

Mondays will now deal with the fundamental THOUGHTS and IDEAS of raising children...

…the fiber construct

Last month I found myself questioning, re-evaluating, and re-inventing my ideas on LIFE. Maybe not so much re-inventing…more like revising them. In doing so I realized how important every little experience in life is. Every single one, regardless of how significant or unimportant it might seem at the time. All are interweaved - every fiber equally important, every fiber part of a whole, every experience being cradled in the construct of all others. Exposing your children to controlled positive experiences is essential to how colorful and vibrant the fabric of their character will become. Help your little ones find the beauty in something ugly, the strength in being weak,the mystery in the ordinary, and the hope in despair. Wow! …so how do we do that?!
Well, it is the everyday little things you do with your kids that start shaping them into physically and emotionally healthy beings. I will give you some examples of what i think is important.

1. Get outside and take a walk with your kids everyday! Especially if they are young - It does not matter how far they can walk initially, they will be able to walk a little further everyday. There is so much mystery outside - so much to explain to them. Make it fun and educational by teaching them about everything they encounter OR the little things that they walk by with out noticing. Have them read the letters on the mailboxes, look left and right before crossing the street, have them point out certain shapes and colors, get to know the neighborhood and neighbors, collect rocks, acorns, buckeyes, and other fun things to take home and make something with. There is always an adventure to find outside!

On a side note, look at some of the health benefits too. Being outside and walking burns calories, and is a good routine for your children to develop and continue the rest of their life. Being outside also helps your little ones create vitamin D, which is important for a strong bone development.

2. Setting them up for failure and teaching them to rise above it. This sounds kind of cruel - hahaha, but it really is not! It is important for kids to know how to deal with failure or an unpleasant experience, and rise above it. It is also important for them to know that "We" are here for them, and that they can trust our advice and support. Creating these situations from a very early age on and teaching them how to get through them, builds their confidence and helps them look at experiences differently. Here is an example:

Scenario 1
Kid A tries to do a summersault and fails…the other kids around kid A laugh at her. How does kid A deal with it? Probably some hurt feelings and no more attempts at a summersault (at least in front of other kids). Kid A might not want to be around those other kids anymore, because they made her feel embarrassed. Kid A might not confide in her parents either. So, this is a negative experience that will be weaved in with all the others.

Scenario 2
Kid J tries to do a summersault and fails…the other kids around kid J laugh at her. How does kid J deal with it? Kid J keeps trying regardless of the other kids laughing. Kid J will keep trying and tho she might not be able to do it, she still plays with the other kids. Kid J knows that there are things that she won't be able to do first try, and she also knows that not everyone is always going to play nice. Her feelings were hurt also, but she walks away knowing she kept trying and did not let anyone discourage her. She also comes home and tells her dad what happened and creates the opportunity for her family to emotionally support her and also practice summersaults together. This experience altho starting off negative, has turned into a great one, bringing the family together and building trust in one another.

I guess the hard part to raising our kids is coming up with some type of fundamental IDEA of what we are made up of as human beings. Once we figure that out, we can start thinking about what it takes to create one strong vibrant fiber, on at a time. Of course that is just the beginning, because we somehow have to figure out how to weave it all together and make sure it does not unravel at the edges over time. The best way to do that is to weave our fibers around the edges… I'm still trying to figure it all out - but it all seems to be working for now. Time will tell…

until next week! Happy adventures on your walks!

Monday – Not so Terrible Two’s

…I have heard about the terrible Two’s, and how our little loving innocent babies can turn into menacing temper tantrum throwing creatures. I am not naïve enough to dismiss millions of other peoples’ first hand accounts, so I have been bracing myself for that DAY when my life becomes more challenging. IT came upon me about 2 weeks ago…

…Now, its only been 2 weeks – and I AM sure I will see different angles to this behavior, But what if I told you that our toddlers unruly behavior is our FAULT?

Piper is 496 days old, and everyday brings about a new adventure of learning and mental growth. In the last month piper has not only leveled up in motor skills, but also in her mental capacity, and extreme hunger for knowledge and understanding. She is at a crucial stage where she is learning to putt pieces of the puzzle together, and attempting to understand how things are connected on deeper levels. In doing so, she needs help…and she relies on us to be there for her. WOW, it took me a minute to realize the magnitude of this.

This is their first major experience of reaching out and asking for help…this time is crucial, and possibly one of the most important building blocks that help shape a vital part of their character and confidence, and of course the cornerstone in your relationship. Be there for them, support them, and they will blossom. Fail them, and it can stunt their growth! - or worse yet…help shape their character to be one that is unsure of themselves, untrusting of others, incapable of finding the quiet that allows us to be happy as we get older.


The tantrums are a direct reflection of our inability as parents to provide our children with the understanding and support they require. The little ones get frustrated because they are not getting the answers or results they are seeking for. Piper would walk around calling every piece of fruit “Apple?!”…not because she could not tell the difference, but because she had no clue what to call the other delicious items in the fruit basket.

It is my job to educate her…practice with her. Piper would get frustrated at not being able to do something, although she knew that it was well with in her ability to do it…it is my job to assist her, and show her how to do things, let her fail with confidence, and let her experience the joy in success.

It is my job to teach her not to quit after failing to do a summer sault the first 50 attempts, as it is my job to reward her with a 2 minute long standing ovation after stubbornly finding success at something that once seemed impossible.

There are going to be many stages in Pipers’ life that will be trying, but I believe that none of them will be terrible, and the time we invest now, will make each future stage a little easier. There are hundreds of thousands of puzzle pieces with endless combinations, that need to be carefully arranged to reveal the final image and complete the journey. We are starting at the edges and only time, love, and commitment will tell if we on the right path. I think we are, and I will be coming back to this subject over the life of this blog. Any comments, stories, ideas, and ideals are welcome…this forum is open to all comments…I only ask that a level of respect be maintained… each parent has to follow their own path and it is not our place to judge or invalidate actions of others…godspeed Mr. Milfians!

“Weekends, an Alien World”

…Every Friday around 5 o’clock, the entire realm of the Jackson household changes…things that are normal and functioning predictably through out the week, become an alien landscape…to ME…

Early on in staying home with Piper I realized that the easiest way and most effective way to cruise through the day, was to create a schedule and a set of rules that both of us would follow. Needless to say it took several weeks of stumbling through the day to come up with something that worked. As Piper has gotten older and passes toddler mile markers, the schedule and rules have evolved with our needs. Not everything is planned, but the major Items like when she gets snacks, eats lunches, and takes naps are not deviated from very often. Structure is one of the most important gifts you can instill in your children, and needs to take root early on in their little lives.

Structure requires parents to be: firm, fair, and consistent in disciplining their children; setting high expectations and creating an environment for their kids to fail and succeed in; encouraging them to work hard and that quitting is not an option; and of course to teach them to operate with in then confines of the rules.

I would like to believe that I am pretty consistent in my disciplining effort, and that my methods of achieving this have been successful up to this point – only time will tell. I always try to take the time to understand why Piper is doing something, or explain to her best I can why she is not supposed to do certain things.

When she was younger I distracted her a lot, because she did not understand the concept of “NO”…these days I stand my ground and expect her to fall in line with what I tell her. No means no the first time, and even though Piper will get upset when she does not get her way, it only last a couple of seconds, because she knows that I won’t bend – so she goes on her merry way and finds something else to get into.

Piper and I coexist pretty well together, and although everyday brings something new and challenging, we have a solid foundation that lets us get through it all with a smile.

…enter into the equation The Weekend…oh boy! On Fridays Pipers Omi comes and watches her for part of the day. Who knows what goes on when I am not around – I am sure its no good. [to all in the know I mention code word KRACKA] My mother must have used up all her discipline on me, because she seems to let Piper do what she wants. I have adopted the Vegas slogan…what happens with Grandma’s stays with Grandma’s…ignorance is bliss, besides - it’s a fight I could not win if I tried.

Friday evenings Mrs. Milf gets home, followed closely by her sister Kim – or as Piper refers to her in a loving way “GAA”. The landscape has already changed for me, because I now have 3 grown women in the house, and a toddler who is excited and abandoning all rules established and reinforced through out the week. There is lots of laughter and fun between the girl’s, and as everyone is feeling good vibes, toys are being left lying all over, along with the trail of Mrs. Milf’s daily work attire. The house that was not perfectly clean, but picked up, is now littered with the meteor shower of miscellaneous random items…and soon the excited fun loving toddler gets worn out and fussy. At this point in time I am already on my 4th beer, so I like to casually lean back on the kitchen counter and let the Weekend Alien Invasion begin.

By my 6th beer the invasion is complete and the aliens have taken over the bodies of my loved ones. My daughter is whiny, allowed to climb on tables, tossing food projectiles from her high chair, attaching herself to her mommies leg like an alien parasite, and many other things that don’t happen through out the week (or are at least immediately checked and contained through out the week). – IT IS NOT AS BAD AS I MAKE IT SEEM, but when you are used to something functioning a specific way, any little pothole in the road seems like a major crater…

The lack of routine and schedule also throws Piper off. Eating her lunches and snacks at different times, or eating little snacks all through out the day totally messes with her. Not having her naps when she is supposed to, or not getting them at all is another one of those major items that impairs her ability to function at her best. No one else really realizes this, because they don’t have the opportunity to stay home with her and experience the contrast in behaviors.
I spend all day with her – not on the couch watching Television, but interacting with her…reading, playing, teaching, communicating with her…so, it makes it very easy for me to see the smallest of changes.

The weekend continues and more family stops by to visit, play, and go out to eat. Of course no one wants to be the bad guy, so small things that could be corrected (e.g. whining and wanting to be carried around), don’t get checked. I totally understand this!!! But in a way it does not make sense to me…I’d rather stand my ground and let the little one be upset with me for a couple of minutes – she is not going to love me any less, and if she chooses grandma or omi over me, I know that it is because she knows she can get her way with them….lol

What makes me a little upset at times is that Trisha seems to get the Shitty End of the stick out of this entire deal. She has to flow with what ever goes on through out the week and over the weekend. On the average day Trisha only gets about 3 hours with Piper at night, and that is broke up by dinner, Me talking her ear off, and winding down for the night. On weekends she has to deal with a possibly unbalanced toddler due to a change in the regular routine, family visiting, and the other possible variables that are bound to creep up. And lets not forget that I can get bitchy at times and “uncontrollably” release a snide remark or two…sorry! You are a trooper, and I don’t know how you are able to put up with me at times.

Anyway, as you can see…the weekends can seem pretty alien, and Mondays are always a bit of a challenge due to having to readjust to our routine.

It is what it is, and I would not have it any other way. I love my entire extended family and appreciate every single thing they do and role they play in our lives. Without them, our lives would be incomplete and fractured, and the break in schedule is a breath of fresh air - the change in gears a necessity to keep growing. To all of you Aliens I say thank you for giving me excitement and a reason to drink lots of beer on the weekends…see you on Friday.



German Pan Fried Potato recipe (well…I actually created this one)
Ingredients
- Any type of potato you have lying around the house Qty: enough for 2 -3 layers, depending on how much you eat
- 4 Tbls Butter
- 8-10 slices of Bacon (cut in 1” pieces)
- 1 Onion
- Salt to flavor
- Cracked Black Pepper to flavor

Use large non-stick pan, heat to medium and toss in bacon. Cook bacon to desired texture and remove from pan. While bacon is cooking peel, rinse, and slice potatoes into 1/8 thick slices (the width of an ipod nano). Add 2 Tbls of butter to bacon grease and melt. Layer potato slices into pan, overlapping just a little, until bottom of pan is covered, season with pepper and salt, add sliced onions and bacon. Cube the remaining butter and add dollops as needed/ wanted. Add second layer of potatoes, and season to taste. Cook on medium uncovered for a couple (2-3) minutes and then turn down heat and cover. Cook for 10 additional minutes and then flip potatoes…be careful…cover and cook for additional 10 minutes. Take off lid and let sit on low until you are ready to eat.
Note: everyone’s stove is different, and my medium is not the same as your medium. It is important to calibrate your stove and oven, so that you know what temp your low, medium, and high are actually cooking at. Following recipes is easier when knowing the cooking temps of your stove…

Thursday - Ramdom FB Status Updates

Jill Walter status read:

In West Virginia yesterday, a man was arrested for stealing several blow-up dolls. Reportedly, police didn't have any trouble catching the man because he was completely out of breath.

Wednesday – Mr. Milfs’ top 3 Affordable Vehicles

These are “MY” top 3 picks of affordable vehicles that belong in your garage. They all come in under the 50K mark, which sneaks them into the affordable range, and if you are like me, you will track one of these epic vehicles down “used”, for a fraction of the list price. Needless to say, I don’t believe in buying a brand spankin’ new vehicle – Whats the point!?!…give me something that is a year or two old and broke in.

Coming in at #3

OK, I really don’t have a number Three, so lets jump to number 2 on my list

2009 Jeep Wrangler Unlimited Rubicon w/factory 3” lift kit.

Did you utter the word options? Well the options for CJ’s, YJ’s, and TJ’s are limitless! Racks, winches, lift kits, snorkels, lights, mirrors, tops, bars, rails, bumpers, etc…etc…the list goes on for days.

The Wrangler has proven to be trail worthy right out of the box. No frills, but tons of thrills when taking one of these classics out onto the trail.

Reliability is key, and the wrangler delivers it in spades. The 4 wheel drivetrain has been tested, tried and survived – the designers of the Wrangler have stayed true to the K.I.S.S. design concept which translates into a vehicle that not only performs well, but is easily maintained on the trail with minimal tools and skill set. A basic set of tools, cable ties, and duct tape will repair just about anything that can go wrong with this beast (lol). This baby sports a 3.8 liter V6 SMPI Engine with a 6 speed manual transmission that generates plenty of power to get you where you need to go. The Unlimited is perfect for the 30 something family who do not want give up driving a Wrangler, but still want to keep their little ones safe. There is plenty of room in this box on wheels, and with the full roof rack installed, cargo space becomes a non-issue. I do wish that at some point they would slap a V8 in this tub to improve the towing capacity, but I don’t see that happening. Plan on dishing out $ 38.000,00 for a Rubicon Unlimited as shown below. Happy trails!

Sliding into the number one spot is the

2010 E-Series 350 XLT VAN- Extended with a Quigley 4x4 conversion and custom after market accessories.

I absolutely love this Vehicle! The 6.8 L Triton V10 is a monster, and a perfect partner in crime for this 4 Wheel Drive Adventure machine. Quigley has been doing 4X4 conversions on Vans for over 30 years and is the best in the business. This Vehicle is perfect for the adventurous family with lots of kids and tons of gear. Don’t fool yourselves though – this is not a rock crawler, or something to take out and play around with on dicey trails! This is a hopped up transporter designed to haul ALL of your shit from point A to B. The features and options are too many to list…you can get this vehicle tricked out any which way you want. The one shown below comes in right under the $50.000,00 mark, but will pay for itself over time. Plan on keeping a specialty vehicle like this for at least 15 years, since you probably won’t be using it as your daily transport. I will be getting one of these once we have 6 or 7 kids!

I hope you somewhat enjoyed today’s segment, and I’ll see you next week! Bottoms up - dick heads!